Hurting Unbelievers in the Post-Election Environment

It took about 24 hours for the shock of the election result to set in for me. My moment of truth came after walking out of a church Bible study. Women who should have been kind turned vicious in their glee over Donald Trump's electoral college victory and shouted at me as I walked out of the room, out of the church.

I came home and cried -- and didn't stop crying for about two hours. And since then, I have dealt with bouts of crying, similar to what I experienced after my father's death.

When I have to drill down into "reasons" for this, however, it has less to do with me and more to do with the root cause of my grief:

The hurt that unbelievers feel.

I need to say this.

If you are a believer who voted for Donald Trump and are gloating about it -- either in person or on social media -- you are severely hurting unbelievers. You are already building a wall, and I'm not talking about the one on the Mexican border. You are unwittingly revealing what you think of minorities, women's rights, the poor, the disenfranchised, the alien immigrant. You are violating every directive from Jesus to love your enemies and to exercise compassion and kindness.

But more importantly, you are further distancing the lost from finding Jesus.

How?

Well, let me ask you this. When was the last time you saw someone new in your church and welcomed them? Or when did you welcome the following:

•  someone who looked different from you in church? 
• someone who looked poor in your church? 
•  a single mom at your church?
• someone who is openly homosexual -- who decided to check out your church?

My guess is that none of those people are even at your church, because they don't want anything to do with you.

If you can answer affirmatively to any of those questions -- if indeed you have done what you could do to offer peace, kindness, compassion and unconditional love to those WHO MAY NEVER DARKEN THE DOOR OF YOUR CHURCH -- and you voted for Donald Trump, congratulations. You've proven me wrong.

As for the rest of you, please read the book of James.

And then examine your hearts. Examine your actions since this election.

Have you done anything that would make any of those people WANT to come to your church and interact with you? Have you done anything to make them want to learn about Jesus and His unfailing love and mercy for them?

If not, you are hurting unbelievers. This election isn't about who won. This isn't about making America great, either. This election has eternal implications, because YOUR actions will either help or hurt those seeking God.

So what have you done?

What have you not done?

What are you willing to do to exhibit mercy, love your enemies, give to those who are hurting and sow peace where there is none?

What are you willing to do to bring the lost to Jesus, even in the face of a divided nation?

Admonishing vs. Judging

Twitter is my favorite online community, because there, you can interact with people all around the world and at the same time receive short messages of 140 characters or less that can encourage you in innumerable ways.

But Twitter has a potential downfall for Christians, if they send out tweets with deep spiritual meaning that can be misunderstood by those who are young in their faith or those who have no faith at all.

I am usually vigilant about not doing this, but sometimes I inadvertently tweet something that to me conveys a deeper spiritual meaning but can be read (and twisted) in a superficial way. This week, one of those tweets led me to dig into the difference between admonishing other Christians and judging them.

Basically, the tweet was from a church pastor, and it said, "If you're not filled with God, you're self-absorbed." 

The words struck me personally, because I've been thinking lately about Jesus's words to the church of Laodicea in Revelation 3: 14-22. You know the passage -- the one about lukewarm faith and how He's not going to tolerate it. Immediately when I read the tweet, the passage flashed through my mind as I thought, "If you're a lukewarm Christian, you are not fully filled with God's desires. And your really are self-absorbed with your own cares, worries and concerns. That's true."

I re-tweeted the tweet, mostly because I felt it spoke to my own nature and inclination to not fully depend on God. For me, the tweet was a good admonishment to be mindful of this.

Within a few minutes, I had a response from a new friend who is an atheist. She felt the tweet was judgmental. Did it mean that atheists are self-absorbed? She wanted to know.

My response ... No. The tweet is directed to other believers, I said. And then I further explained the connection to Revelation 3.

It got me thinking about the difference between admonishment and judgment ... and also the difference between how God wants Christians to relate to non-believers vs. fellow believers.

If you're on social media as a believer, you carry a huge burden to convey the message of God's love in the way in which Jesus conveyed it to those who do not believe. You also have a responsibility to admonish fellow believers.

OK, so let's break this down. First of all, how did Jesus relate to non-believers?

Time and again, we see a compassionate Savior, one who goes out of His way to gently coax wayward sheep to the Shepherd's arms. The examples are numerous. The prostitute who poured perfume on His feet and wiped them with her tears. The Samaritan woman. Zacchaeus, the tax collector. Even some of the disciples were part of the fringes of society -- Matthew, the tax collector, is a good example, and so is Simon the Zealot (who was part of the society that incited revolts against Rome).

In all cases, Jesus speaks tenderly to those that the religious leaders of the day deemed "sinners." He made it clear repeatedly that people who are considered to be "sinners" by the religious establishment will be in the Kingdom of Heaven before the religious leaders would be.

Which leads us to the next point ... the difference between admonishment and judging.

Jesus also pulled no punches when it came to the religious leaders of His day -- the Pharisees and Sadducees. Remember that little incident in the Temple with a whip? Or if you really want an eye-full of Jesus's ire against hypocrisy, sometime sit down and read Matthew 23. Check out the language.

Now. That's judging. And it was righteous judging -- not hypocritical judging (which is altogether different -- what my atheist friend thought I was doing with that tweet).

OK. Now let's look at the difference between that and admonishment.

Admonishment is a loving correction or warning.

I'm a parent of a 12-year-old boy, so it's easy for me to illustrate this with a "mom" example:

Let's say we're going to someone's house for dinner. Before we get there, I say to my son, "Make sure you say, 'Please,' and 'Thank you,' and if you do not like something they offer, say, 'It looks delicious, but no thank you.' Never say, 'I don't like that.' You always want to consider the host's feelings, because she has worked hard to cook this just for us, as her guests."

That's an admonishment. It's gives him the structures of social niceties and explains the reasons behind them -- to be kind to one who has been kind to him.

Now suppose we go to the dinner after I give him this admonishment in the car. He sits at the table, and he rolls his eyes at the food, refuses to put anything on his plate, tells the host that he doesn't like what she has prepared, grumbles and says he wants to go home.

OK, I don't have to tell you that when we get home, he is facing some serious consequences.

That's judgment.

Now let's take this one step further.

Suppose next week I decide to bring a foster child into our home -- one who has been shown no love or care or concern -- one who has had no instruction from a loving parent. We are invited to the same dinner at the same friend's house.

Is the foster child expected to live up to the same standards that I place on my child, who has received my admonishments and love for the past 12 years?

Of course not.

If that child behaves in the manner that I used in the first example -- refuses to eat, tells the host he doesn't like the food, rolls his eyes and insists on going home -- is that child going to face the same consequences that my own child would receive?

Of course not.

One more step in the story, and then I think you'll see where I'm going ...

Now let's suppose that the foster child stays with us for a year, and I decide to adopt this child. The child has only been with us for one year (but 12 months is 12 months).

Although that child has had the benefit of my instruction for a year, is that the same as having my instruction and love for 12 years -- the time period that my birth child has been with us? Even though the child is now an adopted member of the family, does that child have the full knowledge of the family that the birth child has?

You see where I'm going here.

That child will be admonished in his behavior, of course, but he is still learning many things that the birth child knows just through osmosis.

How does this apply to a situation on Twitter, social media in general -- or even at your church, where you may have made friends with a new family in attendance?

As fellow brothers and sisters who are grounded in the faith -- who have had the benefit of the Spirit's guidance in all matters in our lives -- we are responsible to each other to admonish each other. So if I see a tweet from a pastor that says, "If you're not filled with God, you're self-absorbed," I don't take offense. I know this is meant for my good and that the words are to encourage my relationship with God.

Proverbs 27:6 says, "Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy."

In other words, if a fellow believer "wounds" you with an admonishment, you and I both know it's for our good. We examine our hearts and determine if the friend's words are brought to us through God's guidance.

But if you're dealing with new believers (as our example, the adopted child) ... or non-believers (as our example, the foster child) ... you can see that the "standards" of admonishment are completely different. In fact, before you offer these dear people your "wisdom," please stop yourself and ask God how He'd like you to handle it. I guarantee you that you'll get an answer, if you are praying with sincerity.

I have had non-believing friends reach out to me and ask for my genuine opinion on a sin they have committed or a wrong they feel they have done against someone else. But I only offer these opinions when asked for them.

On the other hand, if a church leader, for example, was engaged in an immoral relationship -- yes, you call them on it. See First Corinthians chapter 5 for the basis for my statement. There is a time and place for admonishment -- and there is a time and place for judgment, when it is necessary in order for that person to return to God.

One more thing on this ...

I looked up the original language for the word, "admonishment" in the Bible.

What I found was that the late Hebrew characters -- and also the Aramaic -- in the original text mean one thing:

"To give light."

If you are "admonishing" someone, you are shining a light to guide them.

So let's admonish each other -- and when dealing with those who are still struggling with belief -- be kind. Be gentle. Treat them with the same care and love that Jesus showed the unbelievers in His era.

To seal the point, here is a list of Scripture verses on admonishment for your perusal.

Romans 15:14
Colossians 3:16
Psalm 141:5
Luke 17:3
1st Thessalonians 5:14
2nd Timothy 3:16

A Parable, Re-Told for 21st Century America

Taken directly from Luke 10:25-37. The only thing I have changed are names and geographic locations:

On one occasion a Christian who had attended church in the United States of America for his entire life stood up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?”

“What is written in the Law?” he replied. “How do you read it?”

He answered, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’”

“You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.”

But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?”

 In reply Jesus said: “A man from Indianapolis, Indiana, was flying to Los Angeles for a business trip, and he got lost in the wrong neighborhood. He was attacked by gang members. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. A church preacher happened to be going down the same street, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. So too, a Sunday School teacher, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a homosexual man from San Francisco, who was also in Los Angeles on business, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and called 911 and stayed with him until the ambulance arrived. Then he followed the ambulance to the hospital and stayed by his bed throughout the night and took care of him. The next day he went to the hospital billing office, took out a checkbook and wrote the hospital a check, as the man did not have any identification on him, and he had amnesia, and no insurance company could be billed for his stay. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return to Los Angeles next week, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’

“Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”

The Christian replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”

Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”

A Warning Against Hypocrisy

When I was 16, I memorized the book of Matthew.

I know.

I wasn't just a nerdy kid. I was a nerdy kid with a Bible.

I did this extracurricular activity called, "Bible Bowl." It was like a quiz game, except all questions were centered on the exact wording of verses throughout the book of Matthew. Our little team, called the "Syracuse Stompers," was so good that we placed second in a "championship" involving three finalist teams drawing from the Northeast United States.

Just so that you have the full picture of what was involved ... when I say I memorized Matthew, that means not only did I know the verses. I also could answer any question, phrased in any way. And sometimes, I knew the answer to a question before half of the question had left the moderator's lips.

For example, "In Matthew 5:5, what will ..."

BUZZ!

"Yes, Syracuse, player 2, what is the answer?"

 "They will inherit the earth."

Now look it up if you want to know what I was answering.

I was a maniac.

I was making straight As at school and when I wasn't studying, I was reciting those verses, backwards and forwards. Literally. Backwards and forwards.
 

Now the reason I tell you this little story is to clue you in  ... that when I tell you that I know the book of Matthew ... I know the book of Matthew.

But ironically, it wasn't until this little stunt that Christians across the United States pulled at Chick-fil-A that the words of Matthew chapter 23 really meant something to me.

At the time when I was first memorizing this book of the Bible, I was really stumped by Matthew 23. I knew Jesus was mad. I knew He told off the Pharisees. I knew He thought they were a bunch of stuffed shirts who thought they were better than everybody else.

But until this week, I didn't get -- really didn't get -- the full throttle of His message.

I could quote that chapter here, but you can just look it up at this link if you're interested:

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%2023&version=NIV

Now. Rewind.

Where did we leave off in our story?

(See part 2 if you haven't read it yet.)


Matt (that is, Matthew), just threw a party for Jesus. Jesus told the Pharisees that He hadn't come for the righteous but for the sinners. And then Matt took off after Jesus and became His disciple and then wrote the book of Matthew.

But let's dissect this.

When you understand how and why Matt was such a scourge on society, you gain a brand new appreciation for Matthew 23.

Look at some of these colorful descriptions that Jesus gives the Pharisees:

"Blind guides!"

"Blind fools!"

"You hypocrites!"

"You are like whitewashed tombs!"

"You snakes!"

"You brood of vipers!"


You know, when you consider the kind of treatment Matt suffered at the hands of righteous people, is it any wonder that he quoted Jesus's harsh judgment against them?

It never hit me until this week how these words of Jesus must have seemed like a balm to Matt's soul. In essence, Jesus stood in the gap between the lost and the righteous. He held up His hand and said, "No more. No more will you stand in the way of people learning about God's love, just because you think they're not good enough. I'm telling you that you're out of line, and those who you would condemn will have a place in the Kingdom, while you'll be on the outside."

Yeah.

Read that chapter again.

Now what does this have to do with the Christians who showed their support for the comments against gay people by patronizing Chick-fil-A?

Everything.

See, when you line up as a force and collectively point your finger of judgment against one group of people, you become a Pharisee. You become a self-appointed judge. You become a wall between that person and the message that Christ loves them, died for them and wants to be in their life. Who is going to listen to you when you try to share the good news that He's there for them? Not one of them. Not one of them will listen or care. Not one of them will give your message any credence. Not one of them will ever want to darken the door of your church or shake your hand in the pew.

Not one.

I wouldn't.

Some of you might say to me, "Heidi, are you saying that you support a gay lifestyle? Aren't we told to go and sin no more? Aren't we told that we are not to sin 'that grace may abound?'"

How are these people going to even learn about grace when you've collectively condemned them? How are they going to want to hear about it?

See, here's the thing:

I have to worry about my own soul. I have to worry that I do not sin "that grace may abound."

That means my Achilles heel has to be dealt with: My temper. It's not pretty. It's my cross. It's what I have to crucify daily. And I don't always succeed.

Should I be allowed to patronize Chick-fil-A, given that I lose my temper?

OK, how about this?

What about the men who went to Chick-fil-A, to collectively voice their disapproval against gay people -- who are also married and flirt with me in private messages on Twitter?

Yeah. They do that. And don't make me name you, because I WILL.

Now.

What about those who went to Chick-fil-A who cheated on their student exams?

What about those who went to Chick-fil-A who have an addiction ... alcohol, drugs, porn?

What about those who went to Chick-fil-A who cheat on their spouses? Or abuse their spouses?

What about those who went to Chick-fil-A who gossip and spread falsehoods about other people?

What about those who went to Chick-fil-A who are jealous and covet what their friends have?

Should I continue?

What about those who went to Chick-fil-A who are just so self-righteous that they think their sins are less than others, so they get a pass to be in the Christian Club?

You throw a stone, I'll hit you with your own boulder.

None of y'all are perfect.

There is only One who was perfect, and He's the only One who has the excuse to throw stones.

Now here is the good news:

Christ died for all men.

All men.

ALL. MEN.

That includes the gay community. He didn't come to earth and say, "Hey, I'm going to be tortured and crucified, but my sacrifice IS ONLY FOR THE HETEROSEXUAL COMMUNITY."

Did He say that?

Show me in the Bible where Jesus said that.

If you can't see your own hypocrisy in this, then we're done here.

But I pray and hope that you'll take a look at Matt. I pray and hope that you'll remember that Matt, just like people in the gay community, was a social outcast in his day. And I pray and hope that you'll remember that Christ's love and grace was extended to Matt, NO MATTER WHAT.

But especially, I pray and hope that all of you will come to your senses and for once in your petty, selfish, hypocritical lives will see your own sins before you judge the sins of others -- and that you will show some grace and love to people who Jesus died for, too.

And now I'll pray for myself, because this little blogging exercise has put me in the judgment seat against you.

And that's not my place to judge you. If I do, I'm no better than you were when you went to Chick-fil-A.

The Surprise Guest at the Big Bash

Part two in this story series ....


Tax collecting in the Roman Empire took place at city gates, public roads or bridges.

Matt collected his taxes on "The Great Road," which would have stretched between Damascus and seaports of Phoenicia.

And this is where his story begins, because it was while Matt was cooling his heels at his post, extorting money from his countrymen and otherwise creating havoc for rich and poor alike in the name of Rome ... that Someone dropped by and changed his life forever.

Jesus.

Jesus had just finished His own little adventure when He ran into Matt. He'd been going rounds with His enemy rivals, the Pharisees, the religious rulers of Israel who were revered among the Jewish people.

And why? Well, He'd just healed a paralyzed guy and had told this man that his sins were forgiven. The Pharisees didn't like that, because that was equivalent to blasphemy in their eyes. But no one was talking about that. Everyone was talking about how the guy had stood up, tucked his mat under his arm and skipped out praising God.

So in the immediate aftermath of this miracle, Jesus was walking along that "Great Road," and He came across Matt.

Now if you remember from our story yesterday, Matt wasn't the most popular person. As a tax collector, he was no longer welcome at home. He couldn't even give his dirty money at the Temple. And no one with respectable family values could accept his money, even if he'd offered it as a gift.

So Matt hung out with people who would accept him ... you know .... the hookers, the thieves, the drunks, the other tax collectors ....

You know. Society's dregs.

Filth.

So here comes Jesus, the one everyone was praising as the possible Messiah. And Jesus walks up to Matt's little tax collecting post, and plain as day says to him, "Follow me."

You know what Matt did?

He left his life as a tax collector and came right after Jesus.

Not only that ... he threw a big party that night. He invited all of his friends. And guess who was the guest of honor?

You got it.

Jesus.

And this wasn't just a small little group of good buddies. The Gospel writer Luke tells us that Matt "held a great banquet" and "a large crowd of tax collectors and others were eating with them."

SCANDAL!

Now let's rewind back to earlier in our story ... the Pharisees meanwhile, were still pretty steamed at Jesus for not only healing that paralyzed guy and showing them up, but also for taking the added blasphemous step of forgiving that guy's sins.

And they hear about this little soiree.

They waste no time in giving Jesus a piece of their minds, too.

See ... if you had dinner with someone at that time in Israel, you were basically saying that you held their company in high esteem.

This wasn't just like grabbing a quick sandwich at Chick-fil-A.

No ... this was akin to inviting someone over to your house for Thanksgiving dinner with your most respected family members at the table.

So the Pharisees pulled Jesus's disciples aside and confronted them. "Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?" they demanded.

And this is why I love Jesus so much, because Jesus didn't even flinch or try to pretend that it was a big mistake.

Jesus quipped, "It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance."

Oh, SNAP.

Did you get that?

He didn't come for the "righteous."

In other words, He basically told the Pharisees to shove off. His peeps were right there with Him at that party.

And as for Matt?

Well, you know him as Matthew, the writer of the first Gospel in  your Bible, and one of Jesus's 12 disciples.

Now what does this have to do with Chick-fil-A and the gay community? And what can we also learn from Matt's decision to follow Jesus?

Tune in for the conclusion of the story.

The Day Christians Stopped Being Christlike

I know I said I was going to put this blog on the shelf.

But this week, something happened that made me so irate, so sickened, so embarrassed to be lumped into the same category of the phrase, "evangelical Christian," that I felt this post was necessary.

Usually posts here are designed to dovetail into the blog's theme title: "Christian Safehouse." I decided a long time ago not to bash my fellow Christians and make this a place where people could vent their issues without harassment.

Then I got to thinking about it and realized there were a lot of times in the Bible where Jesus told off religious people.

Notice that I make the distinction, "religious people," versus, "believers." Because if you're not a Pharisee at heart, this blog post isn't for you.

No. This blog post is for everyone who thinks that they showed Christ's love by eating at Chick-fil-A this week.

An interaction with a fellow "Christian" on Twitter last night made me sit up and decide that I won't be silent about this. I let a lot of comments pass by me without commentary, but this is where I draw the line.

I was asked, "What do you teach your child at home?" because of my stance against the Chick-fil-A establishment.

I'll tell you what I teach him. I teach him that Jesus came to die for all men.

All. Men.

All.

I teach him against bigotry. He knows all about the Civil Rights Movement, and he'll learn about what it means to embrace people regardless of their sexual orientation when he's old enough to hear about it.

I teach him that there was a group of people called the Pharisees, and that they were responsible for putting Jesus on a cross. You know why they were responsible?

Because Jesus told them, “He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first.”

Remember that story?

Did any of them throw a stone at that woman after He said that?

No, they went off and plotted His death. They didn't like being called out. It made them mad enough to kill Him.


See, here's the thing. You don't have to agree with the gay community. You don't.


But you do have orders from Someone who died for you that you're supposed to love everyone.


When you're more concerned about going on the war path because a community hurts your feelings, are you turning the other cheek?


When you're more concerned about lining up at a restaurant than you are with feeding the poor or clothing the hungry, are you showing mercy?


When you're more concerned about protecting your rights as Christians than you are about the people who are lost and just need a little compassion and understanding, are you practicing forgiveness?


Those questions are rhetorical.


Don't tell me that your lunch at Chick-fil-A was Christ-sanctioned.


If you fully believe that, you have no business reading this blog. Because this blog is a Christian Safehouse. 

It's reserved for Christians.